This is my I-S Magazine article from two weeks ago. My latest article is in the most recent issue, which comes out every Friday on newsstands all over town. Go check it out!

The Girls Who Look Easy Are Often the Toughest of All

David Tian, Ph.D.

Singapore’s attitude toward sexuality can sometimes seem schizophrenic and even two-faced.

On the one hand, Singapore’s vibrant nightlife offers one of the highest per capita concentrations of nightspots in the world, where thousands of hormonally charged youngsters bump and grind to the latest dance tunes and drink to their liver’s delight (or agony) in mega-clubs until sunrise every weekend.

On the other hand, the government, only a few years ago amid great controversy, agreed to teach teenagers about STIs, HIV, and contraceptives.

Almost everywhere I hear ‘this is a very conservative country’ that looks down on expressions of sexuality. I guess they conveniently forget Singapore’s dozen square blocks forming their largest red light district, which hosts women from all over Asia spilling out from the brothels onto the sidewalks plying their wares.

Simultaneously naïve and permissive toward sexuality, this bizarrely schizophrenic attitude leads to harmful assumptions.

I entered a mega-club the other night with five female friends dressed provocatively―sexy stripper heels, low cut tops, and tiny mini-skirts or hot-pants. Yes, I was a lucky guy that night.

When they went on the dance floor, lo and behold, the usual happened: the Creep Cluster crystallized.

I know you know what I’m talking about―that circle of socially retarded perverts pretending to dance around when what they’re really doing is ogling the girls.

Then comes the next phase. The Creep Cluster collapses in.

The creepy guys in the club who suppose themselves suave players approach the ladies for what they think will be an easy pick up of loose, sexually promiscuous girls.

And then the real entertainment kicks off as the wannabe players gets shot down one by one. Occasionally, the girls give a good looking guy some attention, but then his frustration mounts over time as it slowly dawns on him he’ll be going home alone.

Here’s something they don’t teach you in sex ed.

Picking up Girls

Guys mainly go to clubs for two reasons: to get drunk or to try to pick up girls.

Girls usually go to clubs for other reasons: to feel sexy, let loose, and dance their worries away.

Dating Advice for Men

So if you spot a girl in the club wearing revealing clothing, losing herself in the music, and dancing her ass off, then you’re seeing a girl expending her sexual energy. At the end of the night, she’ll be satiated in an almost post-orgasmic state.

That girl is not going home with you, despite what judgmental conservatives think.

None of those five female friends were single. Their boyfriends and male cousins were drinking with me at the bar, getting a good laugh at the Creep Cluster.

Tips for Men

Here’s a tip if you’re looking for the girls who are down for action that night. They’re usually the ones who are alone or standing apart from their friends, dressed up but not in anything too revealing, and quiet or even a bit nervous.

So yes, the Singapore ‘conservatives’ got it wrong; it’s the other way around.

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