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David Tian, Ph.D., is a Brown University Certified Leadership & Performance Coach, Certified IFS Therapy Practitioner (L3), devoted husband, proud father, and former university professor — helping high-achievers master love, leadership, and life decisions by blending emotional mastery, philosophical wisdom, and evidence-based relational methods.
LATEST FROM OUR BLOG
The Truth About Connection: Why Success Feels Empty Without It | (#060) Beyond Success: Psychology & Philosophy for Achievers, with David Tian, Ph.D.
Smart, driven people often fall into a trap: You’ve learned from a young age that achievement means love, and so, you chase achievement and other external markers of success only to realize the gnawing void is still there.
Most think their childhood patterns will get dissolved by father time. But the truth is, these patterns adapt to your knowledge, and become masters of disguising themselves.Take, for example, the seductive idea of independence. For ambitious men, independence is really isolation in disguise, which leads to deep loneliness (even if you have an attractive wife, thousands of followers, or are the most popular person in any room).
And no amount of external success can save you from this trap. But connection can.
Why Manipulation Always Backfires—Even When It Works
Manipulation promises control. It gets the short-term result, the approval, the “yes.” But the moment you win through deception, you lose something far more important: your own respect. Authenticity might cost you a few easy wins, but it’s the only way to build lasting trust, in love or leadership.
Why Being Yourself Feels Unsafe (But Why It’s Necessary for Happiness) | (#059) Beyond Success: Psychology & Philosophy for Achievers, with David Tian, Ph.D.
There is a seductive and destructive lie many people fall for: Learn the best tricks and gimmicks and you can have complete control over your relationships – romantic and business.
It’s so seductive because it promises control and success, but it’s even more destructive because it delivers fear instead of control and breeds insecurity instead of success.
Worst part?
These tricks and tactics work in the short-term, but they come with a mighty hidden cost: You slowly erode your self-confidence and self-respect – two necessary ingredients for happiness and fulfillment.
But there’s a better way, and that’s what I share with you in today’s show. The solution is simple, but not easy.
				

